Every painful incident teaches us something.

“Why did this happen to me?”, “What so bad did I do that I have to go through such a mishap?”, “why me always?” These are some questions that we all ask to ourselves, the moment we are hit by an unexpected event that is painful. We fail to make out what could the possible reason behind us becoming the victim without any fault of ours. The answers are way beyond some most commonly words like fate or destiny. These answers are hidden somewhere we cannot easily reach. But, where we can reach is the place where our control lies, where the gravity of our true self lies!

 Every painful incident teaches us something. It brings en face some truth, that we never paid any attention to, until they happened to us. The bigger the loss, the greater is the pain. And then, we must remember that the lesson hidden for us behind it must be big too. Its jus that when it all happens to us, we are over taken by this cyclone of emotions that takes away our ability to think, to rationale to reason and the strength to face the situation. This is all because we tend to give in against these situations and allow our emotions to make us feeble enough. So, we just end up surrendering.

But what I have discovered with my own experiences is that any accident that we face is an unsolved puzzle thrown before us which has a piece missing. The thing that causes the pain is the ‘missing piece. It’s the other end that we have to reach to find the missing piece. To find why is the pain necessary for us? How and when does it end? Or will it ever end?

The pain ends as soon as we find our learning from that incident i.e. if we are able to see the reason why it happened so. Like, why do i look for care from others and why does every time the person who gives that care leaves me? So, the question to be asked here is why do I seek care? Was it something I missed in childhood? Is this the cup that was left half empty when I was not mature enough to realize it. So, what do I do to fill it myself? Seek for people or external stimulants every time to fill some of it for the time being? Or, just create it inside me for others and so much that I feel it too when I give it? Only we can answer it! This is one way how we can look at it all with a bird’s eye! Then we’re able to see how it all happened to us while we were simply drenched in our emotions.

It is only then that we get to know if there were some unseen and un-thought of sides too to the whole incident. Thus, bringing in new perspectives to not only those concerned with the experience, but in fact to almost everything around us. And it’s totally up to us how we embrace this change. Also, the way we apply this new perspective in our lives further. That is because after every such incident we end up making decisions. Decisions as to how we will treat ourselves after the painful experience also, how we would treat our life, our relations and every other following experience. No matter how much we postpone but ultimately we come to terms with the loss and its pain and we move on. Evolved!

 So, it’s entirely up to us that how much do we delay this evolution and keep ourselves jammed in remorse. That is, when do we decide to reach the other end to complete our puzzle?